Yeah
Funny I was just reading Elizabeth's blog and laughing a bit where she said she always found my blog a bit dark and negative. I 've got nothing to say to that...it's pretty truthful. I think it's partially my worldview, I am a "glass half empty" type; but it's also just what happened. Yes I am happy to share things about my travels, but I also need to vent sometimes. Don't feel too special, I write in my private journals in the same style.
So much has happened since I last wrote, and I don't want to write a log of events that have occurred in the last month or two. It's enough to say that life has (and will continue) to change ALOT and that I just need time to process some of it.
And as stupid as this sounds for someone writing a blog, a piece of public property, alot of what's happening is kind of private, and so it's difficult for me to open my mouth and shout to the world the way I did before. The circumstances have changed. Does this mean that I don't have anything more to say? No! But I find what I enjoy writing about are my own feelings and observations to things happening in my life...it's what this blog has been about and some of that stuff right now...well I don't know how to report on it.
We all go through different stages and they fade into one another. I just accept it as it comes and try to stay optimistic. I may have an opportunity to go to India after all this summer and that would be really cool. At the same time I am left with a lot of uncertainty and doubt about where my life is going. I know everyone has an opinion, and an idea about what I should be doing...but that doesn't mean they really have a clue as to what is going on in my head.
As a person with a huge ego and a lot of pride, I am learning many lessons right now. Staying humble, moving forward even if it's just one small step at a time. And remembering that this to shall pass. And I know it will.
posted by Konchok Ngodup @ 7:35 AM
3 comments
3 Comments:
Also glad to see you writing again, I think it may be part of your future. All that is certain is uncertainty,life goes on with out our knowledge of how the puzzle goes together.
I've been pathologically optimistic most of my life, and I can assure you it's no better than being a "glass half empty" kinda guy. Hozho - Balance. I'm looking for it, if ya find it let me know where.
Dear Jonathan,
This is something someone wrote to me about you. He and his boyfriend were my favorite TJs and then Swork customers. I actually didn't know he was reading your blog. See our influence on the world!!!
Dan wrote me:
I was behind in reading Jonathan's blog. I'm a bit confused... I thought he
wrote he was moving back to the US in fall, but the latest posting seem like
he's moving back almost immediately (or has already moved back). I hope he
doesn't stay here too long and gets back to his goals very soon. I love
reading his thoughts. He's someone I think I'd be friends with, even though
I don't know him. He's a LOT more spiritual than I am, but if I was ever to
become spiritual, it would most likely be Buddhism. I agree what you
wrote... he looks healthier in his most recent photos. He looks good
cleaned up! I love the fact that he's doing what he's doing and can sort of
relate... I know what it's like in China, though I was only there for 3
weeks. When I travel, I work hard at not being an ugly American and try to
absorb as much of the culture that I can.
So there. Whatever you do I am proud of you. I love you lots.
Well sir, I hope you fiigure out which path you want to take. I tihnk you know that you have a lot of people that will support you in any choice that you make.
Basically what I am saying is "No need to QQ nub, it wil be all good"
Ricky.
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